" Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity."
-Bo Bennett

 

Today I was “helping” my youngest sister do her math. She's learning division, something I obviously learned years ago. As I was “helping” she turned to me and said “The numbers are getting smaller and smaller every time!”

“ Well yeah, that's what division does.” I said.

I didn't think anything about it, to me it was just division, something that I didn't really like and it was just another chore. For her it was something new, something exciting.

How would life be if we were able to find little things like that exciting again?

Sure, I find things exciting. And sometimes I feel like I find some things a little to exciting. Like a new eye shadow pallet, or a cast list with a small part, or a new Broadway soundtrack on my phone. But excitement is a good thing, not a bad thing. Some people try to push down excitement, everything has to be nothing. What if we were all able to find everything that should be at least a little exciting? I'm not talking about overwhelming excitement when you're eating your favorite food, but at least thinking about how nice it is, instead of just thinking it as another meal.

I'm going to be sweet sixteen this year, and I have about a million plans for a party. I still have 2 ½ months until my birthday. That's almost a fourth of a year. Does that mean I shouldn't be excited and planning?

Of course not. I'm not hurting anyone or anything, including myself. So why shouldn't I be excited? No reason.

So my challenge for you all today is to try and be excited about at least one small thing this week. At least try.

So I was looking back at my old posts, and I realized that I haven't blogged in over a month, almost two months, and I have blogged less than 30 times this entire month. I haven't been able to think of anything to post! Any ideas? Comment below!

Two Years ago

Me at 13

Me Now

 

Two years ago I was 13. Now I'm 15. 15, 13, not that big of a difference right? Wrong. I've changed  a ton in the last two years. etc.

Me Two Years Ago:
" I cant listen to things like Lana Del Ray and Panic! At The Disco! Those artists are horrible. They're sooo not ok! Better stick to Carrie Underwood and Taylor Swift."

Me Today:
" THE DEATH OF A BAAAAACHELOR"
" CAUSE YOU AND I, WE WERE BORN TO DIIIIIIE!"
" I don't listen to much country actually.

Me Two Years Ago:
" I will never, ever wear shorts and my hair will stay long and down all the time."

Me Today:
" I'm not going to wear anything but shorts for the rest of the summer, and I think my hair wants cutting."

Me Two Years Ago:
" I really hope my friends don't get a boyfriend or, *shudder* I get one for years and years! And when I do I'll be the kindest person ever to him!"

Me Today:
" Yes!!! She's finally taking to him! I sure hope he asks her out. That would be awesome. Oh there goes my crush! I'll go insult him, that will make it all work out. "

Me Two Years Ago:
" I need to be in movies and be the next Jennifer Lawrence."

Me Today:
I need to be on Broadway and be the next Phillipa Soo."

Me Two Years Ago:
" I know nothing about pop culture. I mean, I'm not even keeping up on Selena Gomez and Justin Beiber. That show's you how little I care. "

Me Today:
" I honestly have no idea how I know who the current bachelorette is. But I do! Along with everything the Kardashian's are doing, and why Zayn has broken up with Gigi Hadid. Still don't care, but I know it all.'


If you actually read all through me talking about myself, I would love if you would do a post/send me a post to put on my blog about how you've changed in two years!

Ya'll should check this out!

My fry Emma helped me start a new blog! You all should totally go and subscribe... La Vie Est Belle

Goodbye Black Box Theater

     I've been acting at the Black Box Theater for almost two years now, 2/3 of the time it's been open, and it's been the best theater I've ever preformed at. The people are great, the director is great, and even though it's a small theater, it's a community. The people that come there have been to many many shows there and know the actors. I've seen people many times, talked to them, gotten to know them. All without knowing their names. But the theater closed on the last day of May.
     I'm going to really miss it. I mean, I'll still get to see the people I've preformed there with, I'm not letting go of them anytime soon! But the theater itself, it has a feeing to it. It's MY theater and my home. But not anymore.
     When I first walked in I was scared to death. I hadn't met any of my other cast members before, but most of them were old friends. I just sat in a corner, thinking that it was going to be awful, that I could never get to know these people. The girl who I was paired up with for a skit who complained about her brother the whole time we were playing. Her brother who copied everything me and his sister did for every game the whole day. The guy who awkwardly stared at me as I searched the whole theater for scissors. The huge guy that I thought hated me. The girl next year that was so much different than I was who I thought would never speak to me. The stage manager who was a sweetheart, but again, so much different than I was.
     All these people that I thought could never care about me, would never even remember me once I was gone? I now call them some of my greatest friends.
     And the people that worked at the theater... I can't begin to explain how wonderful it is to walk into a place you love, just to be greeted right away buy the people behind the counter, and then the guy in the tech booth. Then the play starts and you know everyone on the stage.
     I have felt more at home in this place in the last two years than I have at any other place ever. I'm going to really miss it.

Pre- Show panic

     AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH Jane Eyre is tonight! How can this be? I swear we just started rehearsal!!!
     If you don't already have tickets, buy them at The Black Box Theater's Website and join me! Even though I'm slightly panicking, it's going to be amazing. This is the last show at the Black Box Theater, and it would be great if we could fill the shows!
     (Ya, I believe that everyone that could read this is already coming but still...)

Helen Burns

Helen Burns
By, Ruth Anna P.

I'm one of the voices inside of your head,
Reminding you someday you too will be dead.

I won't ever leave not even at night,
But I won't leave you alone to deal with your fright.

There are others here with me inside of your head,
Pushing you pushing until you are dead.

I'll watch them for you all alone in the night,
Whenever they crawl out and give you a fright.

One day the other voices left your head,
Leaving you behind as good as dead.

But I will stay with you through day and night,
I won't let him fill your head with stories and fright.

Again I'm the only voice inside of your head,
And I will stand by you until you are dead.

Thousands of whispers haunt you every night,
But now I won't try to shield you from fright.

There's another voice creeping into your head,
Calling you waiting until she is dead.

He's whispering your name all through the night,
And you leaving me behind has given me a fright. 

Forgive me,
I really tried.

Please understand,
I thought I was right.

 

Dear World

Dear World,
     Hi. We haven't sat down and had a real talk in a while. Quite frankly, I'm really tired of you. Sure, we've had good times, but it seems like those mostly ended a few years ago when I was little.
     Just a quick reminder, I'm only 15 years old. I don't need to have to have my life figured out. I don't need to be constantly working and running around. I don't have to be worried about how I'm going to pay for an apartment that I don't even own yet, and how I'm going to work in a job I don't even have.
     I honestly just don't care at all about some of the things you seem to find so important. I may not look like a model, but that's cool by me. I'm not on my way to Harvard, because that's not something that's important to me at all. I don't have a boyfriend, mostly because I don't need one at 15. You care a lot about these things, and you seem to be pressing these things on me all the time. I have other, better things to care about.
     I have amazing friends, who I love sooo much. I wouldn't give them up for the world. I have created so many memories with them that I will never forget, and I will remember them for the rest of my life. I don't know what I would do without them. I adore them, and they're worth so much more to me than Harvard.
    I love acting, and I've worked on theater for so long and hard that I'm getting places. I'm Helen in Jane Eyre right now, one of my favorite characters in one of my favorite books. I adore the people I'm in it with, and I love the theater I'm in it at. I would rather do this than look like a model.
     My room is lovely. I like my clothing style. I'm learning how to do my makeup, hair, and nails better. I have skills that I love, but you would never choose for me. I would rather have all these things than a boyfriend any day.
     So even though knowing you is nice, the pressure needs to stop. And you know what? I won't give up. I won't give in to you.
     Later!
- Ruth Anna <3 ( And probably a lot of other people that feel the same way.)